Jeannie guides participants into softening and opening to the present moment, and talks about the role of conditioning in obscuring the “open secret” of awakening. She invites participants to soften in mercy toward their human embodiment, to have patience and respect for our own unique unfolding. She talks about how the unfolding of our knowing and the dropping away of identification is an organic process that is already happening. Our culture convinces us that we can do everything through the mind and the will, and should, and if we’re not, we’re failures. This ignores the fact that we, as individuals, are at the mercy of the Holy, and in the place where we can’t will something because it’s beyond the reach of our will, we deserve mercy, patience and understanding.
Exchange 1 - Participant is frustrated because she wants to express her creativity and she keeps running into physical incapacities. Jeannie talks about the worship of blooming and flowering and the demonization of the other aspects of the organic cycle, and the pull to keep pushing, and the humbling quality of difficulties. Jeannie talks about separation as expressed in agency as the one good thing, and inability as the one bad thing, pitted against each other, and invites her to see the heart and the incapacity as two aspects of actuality, and the humbling quality of the incapacity -- not in charge, sweetheart.
Exchange 2 - When meditating participant interprets certain experiences as good and others as bad. She points to "bad" meaning things that are too hard to handle, and she points particularly to anxiety. Jeannie talks about anxiety as the body saying that something is bigger than the body's resources know how to meet. Jeannie says sometimes it's more useful to "move with it" than "sit with it." Jeannie talks about the creature of the body plants itself in the spiritual path and says "Reckon with me" and that this is is the humbling part of the path.
Exchange 3 - Participant isn't currently part of a committed program with Jeannie and feels lost and far from God and feels disillusioned with what feels like dependence. Jeannie talks about the young aspect that actually needs a reliable container within which to heal and grow. She draws a distinction between therapy (which is designed to be stable and holding for young parts) and spiritual work (less a container for consistent, dependable holding).
Exchange 4 - Participant feels things are hard with the passing of her sister, illness, and rising anger because of her lack of control. Jeannie suggests the participant separate out particular grieving periods from existing in grey depression, and then at other times, comfort, soothe and inspire herself to build her capacity to meet what is rising in her.
Exchange 5 - Participant feels lots of self loathing. Jeannie points to the impersonal nature of what flows through us as well as how much of it is out of our control.